Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak

Ever since Sawyer climbed out of her crib three nights ago, none of us have gotten any sleep.  I actually have been really depressed and frustrated lately.  Hopefully after writing this post I will feel better.  I hate to be negative but I must vent.  So I haven't felt this vulnerable since Sawyer was little little.  We finally got things down to a science, naps and all.  We could put Sawyer to bed awake, kiss her good night and she would sleep until morning.  Unfortunately this lasted a pathetic three months, and even looking back some nights she would stay up late with us or wake up at random hours of the night.  Between runny noses and time changes things weren't perfect but I would take them back in a heart beat. 

Gosh, it is so hard being a mom.  Things that I thought I couldn't stand anymore, I miss when they are gone.  I love Sawyer don't get me wrong but she hasn't been the most easiest child.  I swear none of my friends have had to go through the things I have had to go through.  Sometimes, I really get down on myself and think, why me...but then I smack myself and think how some people can't even have kids and how lucky I actually am.  The only people who get Sawyer are my husband, Jake, and my mom.  Everyone else is clueless, I can talk until I am blue in the face and people still just laugh and say things like:  It is just her age.  She'll sleep in the car.  She's going to sleep good tonight.  She is so smart.  That's how you were when you were her age.  These comments annoy me. 

I am convinced she is either going to me a genius or straight up t-r-o-u-b-l-e.  Me and Jake always talk about what we think she will be like when she is older.  I say she will be too smart for school and do just what she needs to pass.  She'll sneak out at night, wear tied dye clothes, she will chain herself to a tree in protest of it getting cut down.  Her first car would be a old school mustang.

We did convert her crib to a toddler bed.  She didn't go to bed easily though,  the last several nights we have have tried everything to get her to sleep.  Laying on the couch with a binky, with mommy or daddy, watching Shrek or Madagascar (on the dvr), rocking chair, our bed, cuddled up with lots of blankies, heat cranked, laying on the floor in her room, letting her cry, nothing works, this child would not sleep even in our bed she would just toss and turn and sweat and sneak out of my arms like a worm.  It was so frustrating.  She would just climb out of her converted crib and pound on her door, trash her room and scream in protest. 

After asking friends for advice, these are just some of the things people told me to do.

• convert her crib into a toddler bed (check)
• get a side rail, so she does roll out of bed (check)
• hold her laying in her bed, until she crys herself to sleep (mm, nah)
• pin her pajamas to the sheets (seriously?)
• give her benedryl (not even recommended to give at all until two years of age)
• put a tv in her room and let her match a move (no)
• just shut the door and let her cry, trash her room, ect (tried it and no)
• just put the mattress on the floor (her crib is real close the the ground)
• put her on the floor in your room (she needs to sleep in her room)
• get a baby cot so she can sleep in your room (no)
• just let her sleep with you (of course but long term no)
• get a tent crib attachment thingy (Jake highly considered this, he kept researching them online and even called a Walmart to see if they had one in stock)..I read the reviews and this just makes me nervous.

This sort of reminds me of something you would put a dog in.  Hopefully we won't have to resort to this.  She is still sick, sleep deprived and crabby.  It was a process getting her to sleep in her crib.  So this will take some effort.  Rome wasn't built in a day right?  Beside she can count to five.  If she can count to five she can learn how to do anything.  I have faith in my wild child.

mom: "one"

sj: "two"

mom: "three"

sj: "nine"

mom: "five"

See she is so smart.