Friday, July 13, 2012

My ideal labor

Even though, I lucked out and birthed a healthy beautiful baby girl, something just didn't sit right with the whole experience.  To this day it was probably one of the best and worst days of my life, if that makes sense?  I didn't do much research, I just planned to poop her out with no drugs just like my mom did me.  But after having contrations every eight minutes three days prior to actually going into active labor and being overdue, I started the whole process very tired.  Back labor didn't help the situation and after laboring at the hospital for quite sometime, I agreed to an epidural.  Even with the epidural I still had pain, a foley cathedar (that to this day, I believe caused me some urinary incontinence issues), an internal monitor for the baby and contractions (since Sawyer was sunny side up, they had a hard time finding a heart rate) and not to mention an 18 gauge IV in the left thumb (that caused some significant pain).  I also developed an allergy to the tape on my back from the epidural and had some serious itching going on.  It totally sucked.  In addition to checking me every hour during a contraction, which I remember to this day the pain it caused.  And after have no change after an hour with epidural they turned the lights off and told me to get some rest.  What, rest? Are they out of their minds?  I wanted to have a baby.  I remember seriously asking if they could please removed all of these cords and I would just push the baby out.  Then finally I was told I was a ten, little did I know that laying flat on my back, in the most unnatural position in the world, I'd have to push for 2 hours and 48 minutes.  While my nurse kept taking pee breaks and leaving me, my mom and husband to do the pushing.  It was quite awful and brings tears to my eyes while typing.  I also had family outside waiting which only added pressure, and I also had a terrible nursing student, but I was too naive to ask her to leave.

She was quite adorable when I first laid eyes on her.  She was screaming at the top of her lungs and had beautiful color and hot pink lips that my husband and I will never forget.  I remember I was starting to get so sick just holding her, her first minutes of life.  Then after being stitched up like a rag doll, I was too sick to do anything.  I felt like I was going to die.  I was freezing cold, nauseated to death and kept dry heaving into a pink emesis basin.  While everyone was enjoying our new baby I was told to stay in bed, in missery.  I demanded a hot shower because I was freezing and sick and they wouldn't let me.  Finally when I had a chance I walked to the bathroom, barely, and remember feeling so awful like death runned over....a nice nurse brought me hot blankets and I just sat on the toilet.  I would say I was sick like this for an hour, pretty much thought I was dying.  It finally passed but that wasn't how I had planned to spend Sawyer's first hours of life.  There were several other incounters with nurses that weren't so great.  I honestly don't really remember a nice comment, whatsoever.  I remember peeing right away and no nurse would believe me.  She felt my right rib cage and told me that was my bladder.  Too bad I had already peed like a milion times, and that wasn't my bladder.  I was also in significant pain and never got any pain meds.  Finally at discharge, the nurse said, "Can't you just take some motrin when you get home?"  Besides my epidural, I didn't have not one pain med given to me after my vagina ripping to my butt.  I remember just trying to smile to all my visitors but I was in so much pain.  It hurt to sit, walk, move and breath.  This time I am bring tylenol, motrin, aleve and I am planning to sit on a bobby pillow. 

Quite the experience.  I am nervous but do feel like I have the knowledge this time to make the experience better.  I hired a doula, a sweet gal so pretty and regular, she actually went to high school with me.  She has also had two babies natural which totally makes me love her more.  I want to have my hubby there for sure.  Maybe my mom, I would love to have Sawyer there too but she is quite the busy little girl.  And my mom plans on taking Sawyer for that night.  If you are interested in hiring a doula and/or placenta encapsulation.  This is her WEBSITE.

I have done all my homework and read the Birth Partner, Ina May's Guide, among others.  I also plan on watching, The buisness of Being Born, when I can get my hands on a copy.

Is it too much to ask for to look like this.......during labor?

And labor in a tub like this.......

While watching the Notebook....

While someone gives me sips of ice cold cranberry juice.

I don't think so. 

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